Monday 21st December 2015
This time last year my life was chaos,a horrible mix of anxiety, fear, stress, anger and guilt- all stopping me moving forward. I couldn't stand the sight of my body and felt so self-conscious. On Christmas day I ate so much food secretly in the kitchen, wracked with guilt I purged in the bathroom while my children played with their new toys downstairs.
I was in debt but didn't think I would ever be able to return to work again - the thought of walking down the street caused me anxiety -never mind realizing my dreams of helping others feel good and becoming a motivational speaker.
This is not a blog to brag but to show what is possible (for anyone) because yesterday I ran another final 5k session of the 30th Hannah Lilly Beginners Run club, when I got home I worked out the logistics for my second trip to America this time to California for the launch of a book I am co-author of – 20 Beautiful Women Volume III then to Sacramento for an interview and an amazing opportunity to speak, have written for The Secret Stories, blog for The Huffington Post, have been on the radio and asked to write for newspapers both regional and local, have an amazing relationship with my children, family and friends. I love what I see when I look in the mirror and have a carefree attitude to food and my body that I never thought possible. Instead the journey I went on this year has for the most part been filled with love and joy and a life of negative behaviours were replaced with positivity.
But most of all it was a journey that began to unlock the joy inside of me- the joy that is within us all - and a journey that continues.
Gratitude, love, kindness starting as daily feel good triggers have become as much a part of my life as breathing.
2015 was my year of personal transformation, with that came success in every other area of my life and who knows what 2016 will bring.
The best gift you can give yourself and others is YOU- not the perfect version that you might think you have to be.We are in the midst of the holidays right now and even if your house is perfectly decorated, the food is amazing, the gifts are luxurious and expensive and your outfit is beautiful if you have all of that but are experiencing any of the emotions I listed at the start then none of it means anything.
The moment you decide you are worthy of being yourself a journey of healing and creating the life you deserve has begun.