Day 138 of 182
The last post I wrote I put down the wrong day- was a day behind- but now this far in the days don’t matter anymore. When I began I had a clear vision of beginning and end that is no longer the case. What is clear to me now is that there are always things to learn, always ways to make life even better.
What has happened so far in these last 138 days is phenomenal on so many levels. A life spent with an eating disorder, regular bouts of anxiety, worry, stress, never being fully present has been transformed. Now full of love, laughter, gratitude and the ability to see all the beauty in what I have now.
Same life. Same house. Same car. Same family. Same job. Same friends.
Well this has been a strange week, partly due to the fact that I was unwell with a terrible sore throat (something I know I attracted into my life by making a situation more stressful that it needed to be) and that made me aware again of how powerful our mind is and also how my happiness is my own responsibility and that how I feel is up to me. As is the amount of power I decide to allow other people’s words or actions have in regards to their effect on my life and feelings. If I were an onion another layer peeled away this week and I said hello and goodbye to some feelings from the past that I hadn't even realised were there.
This all seems a bit cryptic and perhaps I will blog in more detail again about this but perhaps it will be saved for the book- which I’ve decided to really start working on the content for-I’ve had so many ahaaaa moments and life lessons along the way that I need to document in a way that people can apply practically to their own lives.
What this last week or so has made me realise is that we all have blocks that stop us from living the best life possible. They differ from person to person one and some have latched onto us since childhood which makes them seem sometimes even more impossible & difficult to remove. This is not the case.
Just some examples can be Money, Work, Weight, Health, Relationships and life can be perfect in most areas but one or two that seem to pull you back from the absolutely best life possible.
Having decided a few weeks ago to really step up my use of the Law of Attraction as far as my financial goals were concerned and my desire to be abundant and prosperous, I came to realise that I was stopping this from happening.
People ask me a lot when I talk about the Law of Attraction is it just a case of really wanting something and thinking about it a lot.
Really wanting something and being able to imagine having it is a great place to start. Then you want to be able to make yourself feel as if you have the thing you want, the excitement and satisfaction so much so it is as if you have been told you already have it.
The trickier part can be in really believing that it is possible for you to have this.
Now I can imagine having financial abundance. I can imagine the feelings I would have when this happens. The opportunities it would allow and the limitations it would lift.
I can also see ways that this can be possible for me. So I can believe it.
But what came up lately is that somewhere deep down my “block” as far as money is concerned was that I didn’t deserve it.
This year I knew I deserved to live a life free from an eating disorder, low self-esteem, anxiety and worry, that I deserved to enjoy quality time with family and friends and in the last 138 days by following those ten rules inspired by The Secret I have created that life.
Because it has become so amazing, so so amazing now if anything I think it strengthened this mental block about money because it seemed almost greedy to ask for more when my life is so good already.
What we think about we bring about. This means that thinking about abundance brings abundance but….if money is a cause of panic or stress (which it has been for me- when I get it I worry I’ll waste it and feel guilt when I spend it- especially if I spend it on myself) so these are conflicting thoughts and whichever one causes the most dominant emotion that is the one we bring about.
I also know that although I've learned to love myself over the last 138 days and that it has brought about fantastic, brilliant changes in my life that I can love myself more and today that happened when in yet another Ahaa lightbulb moment I realised that although my life is incredibly amazing
“I still DESERVE for it to be EVEN BETTER!!”
So like an onion another layer has been peeled away and I'm another step closer too that even better life.
Yes we all have blocks, challenges that come up sometimes when we least expect them but the truth is that we also have the power to blast them away.